Get Unstuck! : Career Coaches Share Their Wisdom

By Dale Sokoloff, Psy.D., Sharon O’Connor, Ed.D., and Karen Hoffman, JD.


As career coaches who work with new college graduates, we see the same story over again.

You have been looking for a job with little success. It's incredibly frustrating, and even worse, your self-esteem has taken a hit and you begin to think, "Do I really have anything valuable to offer?"


We think you do. You have more skills and marketable experiences than you realize.


The reality is that it is very hard to maintain a high level of energy, enthusiasm and optimism during a lengthy job search. You feel stuck and don't know what to do to move forward. At this point, job seekers turn to us to help them jumpstart their motivation and learn new ways to approach the job search.

When we coach a client, the first step is to "Start With Your Strengths" - the process of identifying a list of all your strengths, experiences, and skills that you have developed over the course of your life (paid or unpaid) that can then be crafted into a compelling resume.

Click READ MORE below to continue...



When individuals get "stuck" in their job search, they tend to focus on the negative - skills they don’t have, work experience they don’t possess, and even personality traits they were not born with. Their thoughts are peppered with "If only" statements. "If only I had learned a second language. . . then I would have a job." "If only I had five years experience in marketing . . . then I would have a job." "If only I was more outgoing . . . then I would have a job." Focusing on the negative keeps you stuck. Focusing on all the skills, strengths and experiences that you DO have accomplishes two things: 1) it creates forward momentum in a positive direction towards your goal; and 2) it provides a wealth of new content for your resume. When you "Start With Your Strengths", you feel re-energized AND your resume becomes stronger.


So, How do you begin to examine your strengths?


First, and this is very important, enlist the aid of an empowering partner to help you with this step. An empowering partner is someone in your corner, who will enthusiastically help you achieve your goal. It can be good friend, a trusted mentor, or a career coach like us. An empowering partner will make sure that you uncover ALL the skills, strengths and experiences that you possess. Let us illustrate the importance of working with an empowering partner with an example from one of our coaching sessions:


Karen (Career Coach) Tell me four things that you've done in the last four years that you've found really rewarding.

Lila (new grad job seeker) One thing I did that I really loved was my summer job as a camp counselor at a science camp.

Karen: Great! What skills did you learn or use as a camp counselor?

Lila: I really can't think of too many that apply to the job market - I basically organized the kids and made sure they got to their different activities.

Karen: Really? That’s all? So, when you took the kids to their activities, you didn't participate at all?

Lila: Well, actually, I designed some of the activities and helped the kids during the activities.

Karen: Can you give me a specific example?

Lila: We had a lot of thunderstorms that summer and the kids got really fascinated with weather. So, I got some money from the camp director and we built this weather station. It was so cool. We could track wind speed, wind direction, air pressure, rainfall, and temperature. I made up these weather games that compared our data with other science camps around the state and the kids really got into it. By the end of the summer, I showed all the counselors how to use it with their kids.

Karen: Ok - so not only did you get funding for an operational weather lab, you cooperatively designed and built the lab with your students, you designed science curriculum, you taught the curriculum to your students, AND you trained other educators in the curriculum you designed. All of those skills are important to put on your resume. And, as you can see, those are a lot more skills than simply making sure kids got to their different activities!


An empowering partner will challenge you to think deeper and clearer about the skills and experiences that you have. It is just the beginning to thinking about your job search is new positive way. It will jumpstart your energy and motivation and help you get “unstuck”!



Authors Bios:

Dale Sokoloff, Psy.D., Sharon O’Connor, Ed.D., and Karen Hoffman, JD., are the founders of DKS Consulting Group, based in Wellesley, MA. DKS, www.dksconsultingroup.com grew out of a shared passion for empowering women. Each of the founders has more than twenty years’ experience in her respective field and is dedicated to helping women achieve their career potential. Sharon O’Connor, management consultant, Karen Hoffman attorney, and Dale Sokoloff, psychologist, have combined their extensive expertise to offer the strongest coaching and consulting strategies available today. You can read their blog at www.hersuccess.blogspot.com or email them at karenhoffman@rcn.com